Should I Divorce?
Back to NewsYou’re married with children and life has reached one of its many crossroads. You don’t know which way to turn. It is no one’s fault but your relationship with your partner is not what it used to be. What do you do?
Continue in a loveless relationship for the sake of the children?
More concerned about what your partner will get from you if the relationship ends?
You may feel that speaking to friends and family who have been through it will help, but it is often the case that you will only get a slanted view on what may apply to your circumstances. People are very good a hearing what they want to and ignoring what they don’t.
The first question you have to ask yourself is do you want to try and rebuild your relationship? If the answer is yes then you must give consideration to seeking professional help from a relationship counsellor. Yes a counsellor. Unlike the US, here it still appears to be somewhat of a taboo to talk about counselling. Relationships are like rollercoasters, with ups and downs, sometimes we could do with a bit of help to get us going in the right direction.
Staying together for the sake of the children may seem like a great idea, but children aren’t fooled by it. Recent research concluded that 82% of children would have preferred their parents to have separated rather than stay together. You may be doing more damage than you think. Children aren’t stupid and will pick up on conflict between parents and this may affect how they form their own relationships in the future.
“82% of children would have prefered their parents to have separated rather than stay together”
Money. When it comes to money people change, or that is at least the perception. The reality is when a married ends and financial matters need to be addressed the starting point to reaching an agreement as to how you divide the assets is a 50/50 split. This is only a guide. The division of the assets will depend upon your circumstances, which can include how long you’ve been married, whether there are any children, earning capacity, your age, to name a few. Dependent upon your circumstances it may be that the assets are divided in unequal shares, i.e. 60/40. When approaching financial settlements, it is not the case that each assets has to be divided, they can be traded off against each other. For example, one party may get a greater share of the equity from the home whilst the other retains their pension.
“the starting point to reaching an agreement as to how you divide the assets is a 50/50 split”
There are several ways in which you can approach dealing with financial matters but ultimately once an agreement has been reached you should have it drawn up in a Consent Order which is binding document and will prevent either you or your partner from making any further claims against the other in the future.
You should always seek professional help, it will cost less than you think.
To discuss your situation then contact John or Andrew on 01902 429 051 or make a free initial consultation.
